STATE COLLEGE, Pa. (WTAJ) — Beth Shaha, Life Coach, and the woman behind The Grounded Canary shares some tips on how you can conquer your New Year’s Resolutions through a lens of self-compassion. Stop beating yourself up, and start self-reflecting and getting curious.

Resolutions with a Twist of Self Compassion

Shaha says: “Typically, when we make them – we want to start the year off ‘right’…so we look at where we need ‘change’ and tell ourselves that we need to be better or advance somehow.  Even if we are excited to start anew – the judgement actually starts there.”

This can be motivating at first, but our focus is on quickly feeling better, and we rarely get to the deeper, real issue that is keeping us in place.   

But, on the contrary, when we use a lens of Self-Compassion, we can pay attention to something that doesn’t feel good or feels painful.   We literally “sit in yuck” and get curious. 

When we are present and know what is actually causing us the discomfort, we are able to see where we can make change. This is the REAL change we are seeking.

This is what it feels like let self-compassion lead rather than self-judgement. 

We lean in and listen – instead of running the other way.

A lot of people can feel reluctant to using self-compassion. 

If you don’t like, it, you have a secret story operating inside of you.

You may think Self-Compassion is weak.  That you don’t deserve it, you have to earn it somehow or you think it’s self-indulgent.  That simply isn’t true.

Many studies show that self-compassion is good for us physiologically and psychologically. It is essential to growth and studies show that in the end, it makes you more likely to reach your goals and live more freely.

So, how do people get started with practicing self-compassion?

1.        Become Present (especially in the yuck)

2.        Listen to your inner dialogue and thoughts & ask if they are true

3.        Become a witness – without judgement – Hmmmm, I wonder why I want this?    

4.        Be Curious – see areas that need your attention and unlock your freedom! 

5.       Go towards the things that help you live freely and fully!  Those are resolutions you should keep. 

If you’d like a free 30-minute consult with Beth Shaha, click here.

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